Err on the side of compassion



A well-seasoned Bishop was in a quandary on an issue he had with regard to members in his ward.  He met with his Stake President and asked this question.  How do I know if what we have done is enough, too much, or on the other end of the spectrum, too little? Just how much service is enough? 

The very wise and humble Stake President looked into the Bishops eyes, and said, “Bishop, I would err on the side of compassion.”  That was all the council he gave, and actually that was more than enough.

There are times in our lives as Visiting Teachers when we too wonder how much is enough, with regard to the service we give as sisters.  Have we gone overboard, and worn ourselves out, wondering if you can keep up the standard you have set for yourself?  Have we looked away and thought that someone else will pick up our slack, because we simply can’t do it with everything we have going on in our own busy lives? Maybe are we more concerned that we have not done enough, and should be doing more, or at least doing something?

Everyone at one time of another, goes through this self-evaluation process , monitoring our own progression in all aspects of our life.  It is a good thing and helps us to remember why God sent us on this earth, in this imperfect state. We are working out our own salvation, and with each little step forward, we become that much closer to Him. A word of caution would be that we need not be so hard on ourselves, if we aren’t there yet or are struggling just to keep afloat some days.  Sometimes life and responsibilities are just plain too hard, but, the key to remember is that if we are moving forward, not backwards, that is exactly where Heavenly Father wants us to be.

With all the commitments we make in life, how can we commit ourselves to do Visiting Teaching?  How can we know if we are doing what we need to, as a Visiting Teacher?  Getting back to the quote from the Stake President I mentioned earlier …. When a question arises like… It’s the end of the month, and I haven’t done my Visiting Teaching and I don’t have any time to squeeze it in… should I just not go?  Think of the quote: “Err on the side of compassion,” and I believe that you will know exactly what to do, how to do it, and end up feeling good about your solution.  When we do, we don’t have to go back and look at ourselves, feel guilty, feel bad for not doing anything or more, because we did what we could compassionately.  We did what the Savior would have done and did when he was on the earth.  Jesus always erred on the side of compassion, throughout His entire ministry. I am pretty sure when He was busy helping someone in one town, and about doing His Fathers work, it wasn’t always convenient for Him.  Jesus had people stopping him in the streets, needing his help and what did he do?  Jesus Christ erred on the side of compassion.  I would bet he didn’t think about how inconvenient it was to walk many more miles in sandaled feet, on dusty unpaved roads to heal the sick, feed the 5,000 or cleanse the lepers.  Jesus simply erred on the side of compassion.

In the March 1997 Ensign,  there is an article or story under the heading, “Feeding His Sheep.” The story is called “Reaching out with love. ” Beginning with the 8^th paragraph, it tells about how after a woman’s family had moved to England, tragedy struck.  The author tells about the drowning accident of her own 11 month old son. She was grief stricken beyond description and was in a state of shock. The story proceeds, with phone calls and visits from her Visiting Teacher, Joan Davis.  

Every day Joan would ride her bike up a hill to a payphone booth, because she didn’t have a phone of her own, and call this woman.  If her voice sounded despondent, Joan would ride her bike another 5 hilly miles to her home and spend her day cooking, cleaning, and tending the children of the grief stricken woman.  These visits went on for months. It wasn’t until months later, that this woman realized the sacrifice that Joan Davis had made for her, and in spite of Joan’s own personal heartaches and sacrifices, she reached out with love for her. What a wonderful example of erring on the side of compassion!

The second great commandment that God gave to all of us is to love our neighbor, and who is our neighbor?  It is my prayer that we can do so, in the best way that we can for all those who are in need of our service.  I firmly believe that what we do for others, the Lord is mindful of, and accepts our service, how much or how little we can give, with gratitude and love.  May we be mindful of erring on the side of compassion as we serve those we Visit teach.  Enjoy!  Katie Gauger

Image links:https://www.lds.org/media-library/images/bishop-interview-258665?lang=enghttps://www.lds.org/media-library/images/young-adult-women-laundry-baby-669380?lang=eng Video: https://www.lds.org/media-library/video/1998-05-01-the-good-samaritan?lang=eng

Living What We Pray For

A young mother gave a wonderful talk in my Sacrament meeting a month or so ago, and contained in her talk was a poem that really struck a note with me. The poem was called "Living what we pray for," and she said that it was shared by President Monson in a General Conference talk.  I have not taken the time to search for his talk, so I hope she is correct, but I did find this great poem and wanted to share it with all of you.  As I was searching, I noticed that Stirling W. Sill had also written a poem, that is very similar, so I really don't know who the author is for sure, but none the less, it is really a thought provoking one that all of us need.  I made a little hand out for you as well that you can find at this link:  https://www.dropbox.com/s/nw9jclz04z3wlbx/Inspirational%20Door%20Hanger%20cropped.jpg?dl=0




LIVING WHAT WE PRAY FOR


I knelt to pray when day was done
And prayed, "O Lord, bless everyone;
Lift from each saddened heart the pain,
And let the sick be well again."

And then I woke another day
And carelessly went on my way;
The whole day long, I did not try
To wipe a tear from any eye.


I did not try to share the load
Of any brother on the road;
I did not even go to see
The sick man, just next door to me.


Yet, once again, when day was done,
I prayed, "O Lord, bless everyone."
But as I prayed, into my ear,
There came a voice that whispered clear:


"Pause now, my son, before you pray;
Whom have you tried to bless today?
God's sweetest blessings always go,
By hands that serve Him here below.


And then I had my face and cried,
"Forgive me, God, I have not tried.
Let me but live another day,
And I will live the way I pray?

Happy Valentines Day ---- A Day of Roses

I have designed a cute Valentine Day Card and insert for you to print off if you like for those sisters you Visit teach, or for anyone else you may want to give one to.  I have given ideas about using different kinds of roses to go with the card, or simply give the card and personalize it without adding anything.  But, when I was creating this project which is posted at http://visitingteachingsurprise.blogspot.com I thought about a story that I would like to share with you.  I call it, "A Day of Roses".

I know a special friend, who sufferers from depression, MS, and a multiple of other health problems.  She does her best every day to deal with her problems, however at times they get the best of her.  Several years back, when she was in her 20's, she became so depressed that she made yet another attempt at suicide.  Her mother, for some reason, and who was older, did her best to keep her suicide attempts quiet, because she didn't want others to know about them, thinking that this was the best way to handle the situation, which by the way was WRONG!   This time, it was found out, and the years of troubles she had suffered, was brought out into the open, and her whole family was finally brought to the knowledge of the situation.  They all grieved feeling so badly that they had not known their sister had been going through such difficult times. 

I found out about it too, as this young woman was a very close friend to me.  I pondered at what I could do to lift her spirits, and let her know she is loved, and valued, and that she was not judged by me for her challenges.  I had a thought one day as I went shopping at Costco.  I passed by the beautiful flowers that they had displayed at the end of an isle, very close to the check out registers.  The fragrance of the flowers drew me to them, and I looked at this beautiful, fragrant display, and had an Epiphany.  I knew what I would do for my friend.  I know that flowers can lift the spirits of everyone, and especially the ill.  Flowers are given to people who are in the hospital, and so why not give flowers to someone who is suffering in other ways! 

I made a phone call to my Friend and asked her if she was busy that very next day.  She said she was available, and I told her to set aside about 3 hours of time, and that I would pick her up at her house, and we would spend that time together.  I gave her no clue as to what we would be doing.

When I picked her up, I was excited and so was she.  The anticipation of doing something together that was a secret, was exciting.  She was smiling and filled with wonder, until we drove up to Costco.  She asked, "So we are going shopping in Costco?"  I said, "Yes", but what we are shopping for is the secret. 

We entered the store, and because I wanted to keep her guessing and excited, we went through all the isles, and admired so many lovely things, until the point we were just about done window shopping, and we arrived at the flower isle.  I then told her to select the most beautiful color of roses and that I would be buying them for her today.  Her eyes lit up and she told me she loved roses.  She also told me that she had never been given so many roses at one time before.  She took her time and checked out each bunch and finally settled on beautiful, long stemmed, Red roses.  There looked to be 18 - 24 roses in the bunch.  On our way to the cash register, I told he that it was my gift to her, but once they were hers, it was up to her as to what she wanted to do with them.  I told her that there were so many, that she might want to consider giving some of them to others, to make them as happy as she was, or she could just keep them all for herself.  (I had secretly planned and hoped that she would like to share, because it was part of my plan.)  She responded as I had hoped and said she would like to give some away, but then began to question who.  I then chimed in and made some suggestions.  I said to think about people throughout her life, who had made an impact on her.  Maybe a teacher, or music teacher, or friend.  She began to think and speak out loud her thoughts.  She excitedly said, 'I know who I will give to, and she lives very close by. 

While in line at the check out, I suggested that there might be many others who could have their day lifted by being given a rose.  I suggested that she look around as we went from place to place to watch for someone who might need a rose. 

Right in front of us in line, was a mother with a crying child.  The mother looked frustrated and was struggling to handle paying for her Costco purchase, and wrestling with her child. My friends eyes lit up and she said, "I think that woman needs a rose".  While I was paying for the roses, my friend took out one of the roses in her bouquet, and went over to that woman, and said, "I was noticing that maybe you needed one of these to brighten your day!"  The woman responded favorably and smiled and thanked her for the rose.  It was totally unexpected, but so very welcomed.  They briefly spoke, but what I observed was that not only the countenance of the woman struggling with her child, had changed, but my friend seemed to brighten her own countenance, and she seemed so happy and uplifted. 

Next we went to another store and thought that we might find some people in that store who could use a rose.  One of such, was the woman who was at the cash register.  She seemed frustrated by the onery person who had just checked out.  My friend gave her a rose and said that she hoped her day went better from that moment on.  You should have seen the look on the face of the woman at the cash register.  Her mouth gaped open in wonder, and then a big smile.  She thanked my friend and my friend, said, "No thank you for the service you give every day".

My plan for a day of roses was a huge success.  I knew from personal experience that when we give service to others, there is a huge side benefit.  We feel just as good or better than those we had given the service!  My friends countenance changed and she eagerly thought about who she might give the next rose to.  We stopped at the door of a music teacher who had made a difference in her life.  She gave some of the roses to her Mother who had taken care of her and who was also grieving at the thought her daughter could be dead and gone from the last suicide attempt.  Each and every person was happier, and brighter for a time, and this happiness was felt inside my friend. 

After the three hours, I took her home.  She hugged me and thanked me over and over for the wonderful day of Roses.  I told her how much I loved her and how important she was in my life to me.  I told her that I didn't know what I would do without her, and hoped that the good feelings she had inside from giving service, love and kindness to others, would remind her of how good if feels to be alive, and focusing on others instead of ourself.  We talked about how everyone has troubles in this life and that challenges were what made us who we are.  I told her that when she became discouraged, to look around and see that there are so many others who have challenges too, but we can make a difference, by simply being kind, and giving a little service.  When we look outward, we don't have time to look inward, yet a direct result of serving others is good feelings.  No pill has ever been created to make a person feel as good about themselves as they do when they are serving others.

We parted, and I went home knowing I had done something good.  I felt warm fuzzies inside of me, knowing that my friend did too.  I had invested my time, my love and a little bit on Roses, but what a marvelous day we shared, one that I had impact on me and so many others, and that I will never forget.

I hope you enjoyed my true story and will go out and enjoy serving others.  Much love, Katie G

December 2011 Visiting Teaching Message

I have typed up the Dec. 2011 Visiting Teaching message on a festive looking page, and you can feel free to print it off for yourself and take it with you Visiting teaching if you like. (Click on image to enlarge, then save to a file on your computer. You can print from there.)

Here is the link to the LDS Visiting Teaching message for December of 2011:
http://lds.org/liahona/2011/12/an-extensive-sphere-of-action?lang=eng

I am rather late in posting the message and my thoughts on the message, but better late than never. What a wonderful and thought provoking lesson this months Visiting Teaching message provides us. The first quote that lead my thoughts was this:

"The Lord, His Church, families, and communities need the influence of righteous women. In fact, Elder M Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught that “every sister in this Church who has made covenants with the Lord has a divine mandate to help save souls, to lead the women of the world, to strengthen the homes of Zion, and to build the kingdom of God.”
Some sisters may wonder if they can accomplish such lofty aims. But as Eliza R. Snow (1804–87), second Relief Society general president, explained, “There is no sister so isolated, and her sphere so narrow but what she can do a great deal towards establishing the Kingdom of God upon the earth.” Sister Snow also taught that Relief Society was organized “for the accomplishment of every good and noble work.”

As I read this quote from the message, I began to internalize it, and my thoughts began to direct themselves to what I am or have been doing to: "help save souls, to lead the women of the world, to strengthen the homes of Zion, and to build the kingdom of God." I know what I am doing and what I have done as a sister in Zion, but I began to think about some women who don't know what their talents are, and feel they don't know how to contribute.

Many years ago, when my family lived in another state, there was an LDS sister who lived in my ward boundaries, and she was shy, reserved, and had a difficult time even speaking with others. She was had very little self esteem and was very uncomfortable in social situations avoiding people in general. She did her best to get through each day with her own family and staying home a lot, but when she needed to have a conversation with others, she would fidget and look around, and seemed very uncomfortable. There was an occasion that something tragic happened within her very own family, causing her family to become estranged from her neighbors and associates and even some ward members. This devastation took it's tole not only on her, but her own family.

At this time, her family began to counsel with their bishop and in his wisdom he realized that in serving others, and developing their talents, that could really bless this family. The bishop's wife encouraged this woman to take voice lessons and develop the natural abilities for singing that she had. In doing this, she was able to lose some of her shyness and social anxiety, as she was given opportunities to sing in church and even in some community programs.
I noticed a change in her confidence as she was using a talent that the Lord had given to her, of a beautiful voice, to share with others. Somehow, she was able to perform in front of crowds, without anxiety and fear. She sang with confidence and that built her confidence in herself.

This woman joined the ward choir, and stake choirs and even went out into the community and participated in Coral groups. What a blessing her natural talent for singing provided others, as well as helped with her self esteem.

This story is just one simple way of building up the kingdom through serving and sharing personal talents. Speaking of talents, my thoughts are also drawn to the Parable of the talents, found in Matthew 25:14-30. In this parable, the talents refers to pieces of money. For us, talents mean abilities that we have and can develop to bless and enrich the lives of others... "thus building the kingdom of God".

This parable goes something like this... A man was traveling into a far country and called his servants in and gave them some talent or money. One he gave 5 talents, another two and then another man, each according to their abilities. The man who received 5 talents, traded and made five other talents, and so did the one who had received two talents. They magnified their talents. But the one who had received only one, when and buried his talent in the ground.

Sometime later, the Man who had given his servants these talents, called his servants to reckon with them and find out what they had done with the money or talents he had given to them. Now, I love what is said next! This is found in verse 21, "His lord said unto hi, Well done, thou good and faithful servant: though hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter though into the joy of the lord".

Pretty much the same thing and response happened between the Lord and the second servant who was given 2 talents or monies but something very different happened and was said when he found out what the third servant had done with his talents. The lord asked him what he had done, and the man said in verse 25 "And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo there thou hast that is thine". This man was chastened and the one talent that he hid, was taken from him and given to the man who had ten.

This parable then goes on a bit more, but basically this to me talks about the talents that the Lord has given to us, we are expected to use them and multiply them and to serve and bless the lives of others. In turn our talents become a blessing to us, our wards & Church, our neighbors and in our families.

What a wonderful church we are blessed to be members of! We all can contribute and make a difference in the lives of others. I know that the Lord blesses us, especially in times of need, when we serve him. I can testify of that, and for me, I always want to have those blessings available for me and my family, and I plan on serving every single day of my life. I am happier when i am in the service of others and I know that service is the key to joy! The Lord does need the influence of righteous women and if we all develop our talents and use them in the service of our lord, how great shall be our joy!

Katie G.
P.S. At LDS.org, there is a whole page dedicated to seriving in the Church. It can be found at this link: http://lds.org/service/serving-in-the-church?lang=eng

Spiritual Thought about rededicating ourselves in the Service of the Lord

I am assigned the spiritual thought for this month's presidency meeting and I put one together and thought others might also benefit from this, for use either at your own presidency meetings, or other meetings where you need a quick spiritual thought. It is perfect for giving out to the sisters as a goal to rededicate their lives in the service of Visiting Teaching. I also made up a bookmark to print off and hand out as a reminder of this goal. Feel free to use is as it applies to whatever you are in need of it for.

"The Lord Needs Missionaries", Liahona, Jan. 2011, page
4 –6 Thomas S. Monson.
Bike to the Future  By Peter Evans and Richard M. Romney

Lots of young men prepare financially to serve a mission. In Africa part of that preparation is earning enough money for a passport. Sedrick Tshiambine earned what he needed in an enterprising way: by selling bananas from the back of a bicycle.
Sedrick lives in Luputa, Democratic Republic of Congo. He’s one of 45 young men in the Luputa district who is working to save money for a passport to go on a mission. In DR Congo a passport costs $250, which is about two-thirds the cost of building a house.
But Sedrick was undaunted. He earned his mission money by cycling 15–30 kilometers (9–19 miles) from Luputa to small villages, where he purchased bananas, then cycling back across the hot African savanna, his bike heavily laden with fruit to sell in the city. Each week he traveled about 180 kilometers (112 miles) along the sandy roads, and only once did an unbalanced load cause a tumble.
For his efforts Sedrick earned about $1.25 a week, or $65.00 a year. It took him four years to save enough to purchase his passport, but now he knows his future will include a full-time mission because he is financially ready to answer the call to serve.
The scripture found in Matthew 16: 28 comes to mind as I think about this story. “He who loseth his life in this world, for my sake, shall find it in the world to come.
We are so blessed to live in an area of the world, where going to church, attending the temple and serving in our wards is so easy, close and relatively effortless… really only requiring the sacrifice of our time. Because we have it so good, we sometimes take for granted our blessed circumstances. . We should be mindful of the sacrifice so many others have to make just to attend church or like the young man in this story, to be able to earn enough just to get a passport so that he can serve a mission. May we all today, rededicate our lives in serving in the capacities that we are called, with all our hearts might mind and strength, and like the scripture in Matthew 16:28 says, “losing our lives in His service, that we might find it (meaning our lives) in the world to come. (Matthew 10: 39)

Enjoy!  Katie G.

Shoes for Haiti campaign

Go to the following link to read about this worthwhile campaign to help the people of Haiti http://www.localnews8.com/global/story.asp?s=11863818 Utah athletes to collect shoes for Haiti victims.... Associated Press - January 22, 2010 8:05 AM ET SALT LAKE CITY (AP) - Athletes at the University of Utah are collecting gently used shoes for victims of the earthquake in Haiti.

Shoes are needed in Haiti. Athletes at the U of U are collecting gently worn shoes to give to the victims of the earthquake in Haiti. This is late notice, but the shoe drive will be held today when the Utes host Georgia in gymnastics and at the men's basketball game against Air Force on Saturday. The donation bin will be at the Huntsman Center Entrance. Please forward on to all your friends and let's do something to help. Shoes of all sizes are needed! Read below for more information:

• This shoe drive is something that everyone can do to help the earthquake victims in Haiti. If you or anyone you know are going to either the basketball game on Saturday (U of U vs.. Air Force) or the gymnastics event (Utes vs.. Georgia), you can take your gently worn shoes of all kinds and deposit them in the bins outside the Huntsman Center. Maybe even take this one step further, and call some friends for donations to be brought to your house, and then you take all the donations with you to these events. It is worth the trip, and will make you feel that you have done something to help out this great cause! Pass this on to your friends and let's get the word out in a hurry.... the drive is today and tomorrow (Friday, and Saturday)

ALSO: Sports Chalet stores nationwide is also collecting shoes in the "Soles4Souls" campaign. All Sports Chalet store locations will have a collection bin for gently used shoes to be sent directly to Haiti. The link for this is http://blogs.pe.com/moms/2010/01/sport-chalet-stores-collect-sh.html They will be collecting shoes until the January 30th, 2010. To find locations, go to http://www.sportchalet.com/

There is a woman in Lehi, Utah named Jeannie, who will be collecting shoes in this area to be donated to this Soles4Souls campaign. She will be collecting shoes at the "Curves" location in Lehi, Utah until the morning of January 30th, 2010. She will then take all the donations up to the Salt Lake location of Sports Chalet to be added to those they have collected. ( Sports Chalet is located in Jordan Landing - 7682 S. Campus View Dr. West Jordan Utah and phone # is 801-282-0619) The Lehi Curves address is 785 East 200 South #12 and it is right next door to where the A Fresh Market (or old Albertsons foods).

Everyone has at least one pair of shoes they have either grown out of, or don't fit right, or you don't wear for one reason or another that you have had in your closet waiting for the right time to bring them out again, but that time has never happened. Maybe the right time is now, and certainly your shoes donation will be gratefully accepted! I have a favorite poem that says.... If you want to be happy, give something away. Also one of the greatest ways to cure depression or take away the blues is to give service. There are side benefits for sharing what you have with others.

Pass this on to others you know who you think might like to share in these compassionate service projects! When a disaster hits, many people sit around and feel sad about what has happened and though they would like to do something, they don't know what to do to help. This is a way that you can help and I urge you to participate in this worthwhile cause!

Sincerely,
Katie G.